Perhaps, one of the saddest and definitely, gut-wrenching moments whilst riding on the bus back in August, was the encounter of this small, kinky-haired blond kid with a moustache and only the clothes on his back. His arms were shaking uncontrollably as if to reach out to someone. He was packed within a load of homeless people in the back. It was a hot and sticky summer morning and it reeked of bodily stench, meth and urine. It was the unGodly #4 and my only connection home. A five minute ride to Vermont, became virtual hours of heart-breaking agony.
“All they want to do is fuck me.” He cried out, buried in a pile of human excrement and clearly coming down from a really bad trip. “All they do is fuck me.” He shouted out louder, in hopes someone, anyone, could relieve even a fraction of his agony.
“They stole my money!!” He blubbered. “They stole all my money!!! he sobbed. Mother fuckers!!!”
That would follow since he was a small, young and vulnerable morsel. It was clear he was having a complete and utter emotional breakdown, calling out for help, into an empty void. He’s probably been raped, beaten robbed and humiliated on a daily basis, waiting for that fateful day where it all ends.
Looking at him reminded me of a nature documentary where the unattended kids of a den are soon eaten by the hungry predators. He probably didn’t have much time left either. Someone will finish him off. Full consumption. Nothing left, like the children left unattended by their mothers in the wild. Soon his misery will end, either by his own hands or someone’s with no heart.
The only trace of him, are the words describing him here, I suppose.
Mental illness. Drug Addiction, Alcoholism, Depression.
ANY ONE of these single human diseases are overwhelming to deal with within ONE single individual. All can be treated to the point of control or elimination, but that would require a DESIRE for our society to make that choice. It is therefore, out of our hands.
According to the U.S. Census Bureau, in 2021 Los Angeles has a population of about 3.84 million. In my world, I would guestimate 1 in every 3 people, I encounter (diagnosed or otherwise) exude or possess one or more of the above mentioned issues.
Having said that, this approach gives me a dubious upper hand in dealing with those inflicted. For example, upon crossing paths with a mental defective that perhaps would like to kill me, the mindset is not to back down or step aside. This, of course would imply fear or weakness, and thus unleash a slew of nastiness from “those who oppose”. Instead, we give the impression of confrontation, a kind of human chicken where you do not dare step aside.
They always get out of my way.
CJ Davidson,
Chronicler
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